"The Boston Razor"

"Anything unknown must be terrorism."

(This comment on hysteria in New Haven, Connecticut.)

I have never heard of "hashing". It looks like people who like to drink and run around. I say it's all very odd; marking false trails and chasing each other around the damned countryside. They probably read Balzac in the nude, too. Who the hell knows?

We must know, however. Aside from just nuking the place from orbit, it's the only way to be sure.

We should issue these people big hunks of varnished plywood to run around with, like the hall-passes in my high-school, so everybody will be safe at a glance.

Definitely press the felony charges, though. An example must be made, accountability restored, steps taken.

Later --

"The incident drew dozens of New Haven and state police officers, firefighters, health department workers, FBI agents and other personnel from New Haven and neighboring communities, as well as special equipment from the U.S. Postal Service’s Wallingford processing center, which authorities say is the only place in the state that has such equipment."

(New Haven Register)

...and Jesus knows we'd better protect our phony-baloney jobs not miss a chance to put all that stuff to work or none of that funding is going to work out. And, we get to soak the perps for costs and look all responsible and civic-minded. This is going to work out on both ends.

Just so nobody is going to "take situations like this lightly".